SOCIALIZATION

A Call To Men

The "A call to men" lecture by Tony Porter, he argues that men perceptions of women are that they see women as less valuable to them. Traditionally, men have always known as the breadwinner, strong one, dominant, leader, fearless and tough as oppose to women, the nurturer,  weak,  follower, and obedient to authority (males).  

Porter gave some examples of his experience he had, one as a child and as an adult. Two of which stood out to me the most are:

At the age of twelve a man asked Porter if would like have a sexual encounter with a young girl in his bedroom, he then replied yes! He wanted to prove that he was man enough and also to avoid ridicule. However, in the back of his head he knew it would be wrong to engage in sexual act with the girl and could be punishable by law; also he was still a virgin. So he stood behind the door in the bedroom for a while, and then walked out into the Living room with his pants down to indicate that he had done it, where there were a lot of men waiting in line for their turn. This is evident that some men have no respect for women and sees them as their use toys (sexual object).

Secondly, he speaks of a time when he had a conversation with a young boy, asking him how he would feel if his coach called him “A GIRL” in front of all the players. The boy then replied: “It would destroy me!”    

 From an early age, boys are helped to acquire a masculinity that allows them to assume and maintain that position. By the same demonstration, girls are taught to cultivate a submissive femininity. The resulting difference in the male and female character is then described as inherent and used to defend the existing power arrangement. Only those who accept it are normal, and only they can expect to succeed. The male social role is designed to reward masculine men, while the female social role offers its relative advantages only to feminine women. (The aggressive man will run the bigger business; the pretty, agreeable woman will find the richer husband.) In other words, masculinity and femininity are gender qualities which are developed in response to social discrimination. However, once they have been developed, they justify and cement it. The masculine and feminine gender roles mutually reinforce each other and thereby perpetuate the inequality on which they are based. Certainly some of the things boys are being taught about girls are absolutely immoral and destructive to the female body. Until we as a society step up and reconstruct the thoughts we instill in our children, the perception men have against women will not stop and may mimic the behavior against Islamic and African women causing VIOLENT OPPRESSION.

In a recent video I watch called "KILLING US SOFTLY" by author Jean Kilbourne, she stated that women's body are being advertised as sex products and how advertisement have a great impact on our daily lives as we are exposed to an average of 3000 ads per day that most people today are hardly aware of it and assume that advertising has no effect on them. Contrary to popular belief, however, advertising exerts an enormous influence on our thoughts, attitudes, perceptions and actions.

 For years society have been socially structured in ways that separate males from females with high expectation from women to be sexy, beautiful, educated, slender, attractive and maintain a pleasant odor at all times. The anxiety girls and women experience from feeling unattractive is arguably one of the most pervasive and damaging consequence of advertising. Only one body type is almost always presented in the media and in advertisements that of a very tall, thin woman one who would meet the criteria for anorexia as 15% below normal weight. In reality, this unhealthy body shape is unattainable for 99% of women. As Jean Kilbourne said, many times, even these "beautiful" women are deemed not good enough for advertisements. Photographs are airbrushed or otherwise changed to remove any lines, bumps, or lumps, anything less than "perfection." If the ideal of beauty is physically unachievable, then consumers will never be able to attain the image they want, and therefore there will be an endless demand for new beauty products.

This is the reason for the incredible proliferation of the weight-loss, fashion, and cosmetics industries, which are among the largest and most profitable consumer industries.

As a result, the millions of women and girls who are unable to reach this standard of beauty feel a sense of failure, shame, and guilt. This dissatisfaction with one's body is a major cause of eating disorders which have increased through the years as women's ideal body weight as it is portrayed in the media has lessened. One study revealed that women who view the media's image of beauty as ideal are more likely than any other group to have a very negative body image.

 In comparison, both videos speaks of the roles females and males play in society as a result of how they were taught to socialized. Advertisement depict images of portraying women as sex objects, in order to increase the appeal of their product, being as sexy and desirable as oppose to men, strong, dominant, fearless, violent and breadwinner. I remember growing up i wanted to do almost everything that the boys did, especially my brother, who were a role model to me as a child. I wanted to engage in activities they did such as playing soccer, cricket, ride bicycles, climbing trees to pick fruits because they are always engaged in activities that are adventurous. However, my mother would object on that saying that girls should stay home play with dolls, read a book, help with cleaning and learning how to cook.